Little league coaches and parents are notorious blowhards. The vast majority of young people who eagerly join youth sports leagues in kindergarten will quit before middle school. Some discover their talents are not in athletics, but many kids are so beaten-down and discouraged by the elitist competition and the relentless barrage of criticism, they give up on sports all together.   It’s a dirty, crying shame. Not all young people are athletically inclined, but they... READ MORE

Work and Concentration Healthy adults are a diverse population, outstandingly different in our goals and intentions.  The legendary psychologist Erik Erikson noted that most healthy people mature in predictable phases.  He also pointed out that all healthy people have two things in common: we engage in constructive work and we invest in love. Maria Montessori used different terms to describe the growth of children, but her message was essentially the same.  She noticed that when... READ MORE

Reading Charlotte’s Web In a week or maybe two, my husband will finish reading Charlotte’s Web for the fourth time, the first time when he was a child, and once for each of our three children. My husband has a low, mumbly voice, and he is often very tired when he sits down in his rocking chair to read at night, but we cherish every word he reads.  Our children greet Wilbur and Charlotte every... READ MORE

Sit beside a grandma with a hot drink, time, and a few good questions.  Ask her to talk about her grown children, what they were like at different ages, how they struggled, when they were frightened, confident, lost, successful.   Ask her what she loves about one of her children, and what drives her crazy.  Remembering will bring her great joy, even when the memory is sad.  When she talks about her child’s character, the qualities... READ MORE

It is a very short walk from Max’s classroom to the gym. He passes through the toddler room on the way, and it takes every ounce of self-control he can muster not to sprint the distance. One day several months ago, one of the youngest toddlers knocked a plant off the shelf.  Before an adult could offer help, four-year old Max noticed as he walked back to class from gym. Max found a dustpan and... READ MORE

Being very rich so far as I am concerned is having a margin.  The margin is being able to give. - May Sarton, Journal of a Solitude Raising children who conduct their lives according to a moral or ethical standard has never been easy.  Yet today’s parents and teachers – even those of us who continue to delight in our work with children – wonder if something significant about childhood is missing.  We suspect our... READ MORE

If you give a child a chore, she’s going to smile and ignore you. She’ll dance and play in the usual ways.   When you remind her she has a chore she’ll probably stomp to her room and shut the door. When she’s bored, she’ll ask to use the computer. Then she’ll want a snack.   When you say “no,” she will wonder if you are serious. So she’ll consider doing the chore. Then she’ll... READ MORE

There was a time when bullies were easy to spot.  On playgrounds and sidewalks, in swimming pools and cafeterias, they were the biggest boys.  A “good bully” usually had at least one flunky on his left, one on his right, a few thugs skulking behind.  Bullies knew how to avoid teachers, throw a punch, identify weakness, and instill fear. Today’s bully could be a geek or a girl, an old-fashioned tough-guy, a fourth-grade kid with... READ MORE

A genius possesses rare talents of the mind and heart.  They are usually awkward introverts, strange, muttering fellows who boil vast quantities of complex information down to one useful truth.  Stephen Hawking nestled the universe into a nutshell.  Charles Darwin explained the evolution of all life through the wizened smile of a tortoise.  Jonas Salk pondered millions of polio cells and created the tiny vaccination that rescued humanity. Parenting is not a competitive field, though... READ MORE